MATUKIO MBALIMBALI KATIKA MECHI YA LEO CHELSEA SC

Centre of attention: Chelsea face Barcelona for a spot in the Champions League final on Tuesday night

'When super-villains want to scare each other, they tell Joker stories,' says Trickster, a lesser crook appearing in the 1995 DC comic series Underworld Unleashed. 

Those wanting to scare Barcelona tell Chelsea stories instead. John Terry standing firm with two broken ribs. The six games that have passed since Barcelona last beat them. The time Chelsea came back from 2-1 down to win 5-4 on aggregate. 

'Really strong, really competitive,' was how Barcelona central defender Gerard Pique described Chelsea yesterday. 

Leading the way: The Blues arrive in Barcelona with a slender 1-90 advantage over the Spanish giants

'They know how to play these games and are very experienced. Didier Drogba, Frank Lampard, players like this have a lot of games in their legs. They know exactly what they are doing.'

Behind the curmudgeon's mask - Barcelona's players rarely lose without laying a charge of anti-football against the victors - there appears grudging admiration between these sides. 

When Barcelona captain Carles Puyol greeted his opposite number Terry before last week's match at Stamford Bridge, there was surprising warmth between the two old warriors. 

Hair we go: David Luiz and Didier Drogba train at the Nou Camp on Monday evening 

 

As Puyol nursed a hand injury in the first-half, Terry held it almost mockingly when they came together at a corner, as if to make the point that men of their stature are not fazed by trivial wounds. Puyol, of course, played on. 

As Barcelona and Chelsea will play on tonight, beauty and the beast, their styles contrasting, perfectly. The best fights, it is said, are between boxers who conflict technically, and perhaps the best football, too. 

Barcelona versus Barcelona Lite would be a poor contest - as it has often proved when the Catalans face Arsenal, and even Manchester United of late - but Barcelona pitted against a nemesis, Chelsea, or any of the teams managed by Jose Mourinho (which still includes Chelsea to some extent, such is his terrifying influence) is a real match. 

Reach for the stars: Chelsea are looking for revenge after losing their 2009 semi-final against Barca

So they need each other. Just as Holmes needed Moriarty, 'the Napoleon of crime' as Arthur Conan Doyle styled him, so Barcelona must take their own trip over the Reichenbach Falls, locked in combat with a cunning, brutish villain, powerful, relentless, and last week seemingly impervious to attack. 

The critics have it wrong. 'For the sake of the game, I hope Barcelona win,' said former Manchester United goalkeeper Edwin Van Der Sar. 'I love teams who attack, Chelsea did nothing but defend with nine players.' 

Ronald Koeman, who scored the goal that won Barcelona the European Cup against Sampdoria in 1992, joined this chorus of disapproval.

Pure theatre: The Nou Camp will play host to Tuesday night's second leg

'I have no admiration for Chelsea's approach,' he sniffed. 'I was appalled they did not try to make more of the game. As a coach, I would never let my team play as Chelsea did.' 

As a coach he may not get the chance again. Koeman's Feyenoord team are currently third in the Dutch Eredivisie, six points off top place, but three points from sixth. This is his ninth coaching job since 1998 and while he has won three Dutch titles (Ajax 2001-02, 2003-04 and PSV Eindhoven 2006-07), recent appointments include a disappointing spell at Valencia, who fell to 15th on his watch and seven defeats in 16 matches during a brief spell at AZ Alkmaar. 

High-minded principles are to be admired but a meeting of Barcelona and Koeman's current Feyenoord team would in all likelihood be a mismatch, signifying nothing. 

On the ball: Barca will be keen to bounce back from their 2-1 defeat at the hands of Real Madrid on Saturday

There is little more tiresome than good football, played ineffectively. Barcelona murder teams that try to match them technically without the necessary equipment. All Chelsea have ever done to frustrate them is play to their own strengths and coach Roberto Di Matteo's gameplan is unlikely to stray too far from the tried and tested tonight. 

'We have to attempt to score, because it is difficult to play for a goalless draw in Nou Camp,' he admitted. 

'We will concentrate on the qualities within this team, look at the strengths of our players and the weakness of the opposition. We need to get the best out of ourselves.' 

Does this mean more dogged defending, a bank of nine resisting, quick counter attacks and some direct play up to an imposing forward, probably Drogba? More than likely. But what is wrong with that? Where does it say that football equates to Barcelona and a million lame imitations?

In charge: Guardiola oversees Barcelona's exciting brand of football